Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Morning Notes

Dear Durango Driver,

Any elementary school science student can tell you that two pieces of matter can not occupy the same space at the same time. Motor vehicles are mostly made of matter. Therefore, you really need to look AND signal before changing lanes. Your car is made of matter. My car is made of matter. So, since they are made of matter and can't occupy the same space, WHY the bloody hell did you attempt to change lanes on top of me? My car is bright red! How do you not see a bright red car? Oh, and flipping me off for your idiocy was just a brilliant touch of class.


Dear Explorer Driver,

Now, I don't know how they do things on your planet, but here, if there is no left turn signal and you're waiting to turn left, the drivers coming from the opposite direction who are going straight through get to go first. So it is, has been, and ever shall be, road without end, amen. Really, it's much safer for all of us if we all play that way.


Dear Executive Secretary,

Why are you driving so fast through the parking lot? Why the attempt to run down a poor soggy pedestrian? And that is NOT a parking space you park in every day! It has stripes on it! What makes you so special?


Dear umbrella,

As if turning inside out wasn't enough, you had to also develop a hole? *sigh*


Dear self,

Why did you get up this morning?

2 comments:

Lyrically speaking said...

This was enjoyable to read, I really like the last one about the umbrella

Michelle said...

This was a comical read even if it was at the expense of a very bad day.

How have you been? I haven't talked to you in a while.